Day 11 - The (Semi) Public Prayer
“Again, truly I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything they ask for, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.” Matthew 18:19-20 (NIV)
A moment of transparency: I get anxiety thinking about public prayer. Praying in front of or with others makes my blood pressure rise. It’s not because I don’t know how to. But I don’t necessarily pray the way any one else prays, and quite honestly, I often think that I don’t have the spiritual maturity to pray effectively and powerfully in public spaces. I know I’m not alone in feeling this way. But, God clearly does not think that way. More and more frequently, He has told me to pray for anyone and everyone, including strangers and people that are way out of my “spiritual league.” And not the “pray-for-this-person-in-your-private-prayer-time” type of prayer, but the “go-up-to-them-and-pray-with-them-now” type of prayer. Yikes.
The reality is that if God gives you an assignment, you’re going to have to pray- over yourself, your assignment and all of its components, and probably others. My assignment of encouraging women with chronic illnesses is impossible without prayer, and, really, that could be said of any area of my life. I understand, have seen, and am a result of the power of prayer, and it would be disobedient and a disservice to everyone, including God, if I kept it to myself. I KNOW ALL OF THESE THINGS as true, yet the spirit of anxiety has kept me from growing…
Last year, God told me to approach and pray for someone that is a powerhouse, spiritually-speaking. I had a panic attack. A full-on, couldn’t breathe, sobbing panic attack. I left without praying for this person, and I cried all day about being disobedient. All I could think about was “what if my prayer was needed for this person in that exact moment? What if my prayer would’ve changed the course of this person’s (or my own) day, month, or life?” To this day I still think about what would’ve happened had I been obedient. (But, I’m so thankful that God gives us second (and third, fourth, and fifth) chances, because the next time I was given the opportunity, I prayed for this person).
After that embarrassment, God knew I needed to gain confidence in my prayer life. So, He gave me encouragement in the form of a prayer partner. My sister-friend suggested we pray together, and we have done so (almost) every Friday since then. I’m not sure she knows how much I needed her to make that suggestion and then follow through on it. And I don’t think she understands how instrumental she has been in building my spiritual confidence up. Our prayer calls have given me a judgement-free zone where I can comfortably pray, and not worry about messing up. They have shown me that I don’t have to fret about what to say and how to say it, God will speak through me. And most importantly, He has shown me that my prayer can be just as effective as my sister’s, even though she has more spiritual knowledge and maturity than me. My growth has been amazing even to myself. So, THANK YOU, SIS – YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!
Okay, so what does this mean for 2019? I’m saying goodbye to anxiety. I’ve realized that if God calls me to pray for someone, it’s because He believes I have the ability to tap into His power in order effectively pray for him/her. I’m ready to live out that belief. I have plans to increase my knowledge and wisdom of intercession and praying for others by researching the topic, because preparation and knowledge are antidotes to anxiety. And I expect to add to my prayer partner list. I’m so excited to see my prayer life soar to new heights this year, and I hope the same for you!
Food for Thought: How do you feel about praying for others in a public or semi-public space? If it makes you anxious, I understand 100%. If God has called you to a position to pray for others, it means He knows you capable of doing so. Get yourself a prayer partner or attend prayer meetings, research the topic, and read the Word to build up your confidence. Most importantly, continue praying privately – when He sees your praying there, He can trust you to pray out in the world (Matthew 6:5-6).